I have had some real intense experiences during these last 2 months. Today while walking home listened to a song which had that message in the title: ALL THE LOVE YOU ARE LOOKING FOR LIES IN YOU! It was a good reminder to me and I guess to everyone to never forget that! We are all so occupied to find love outside of ourselves that we very often forget to find it in ourselves. It gets us nowhere, as in the end we are going to have only ourselves anyway. I am so grateful for everyone who have been part of this journey to get me that far deep in ME. It has been a very deep and salty dive. I thought I have seen the rock bottom, but this was even deeper…

So I guess my lesson learned – never leave your self love on the second place!  It does not mean that you have to be narcissistic, but always beam the first layer of love to yourself at all times. I guess when it gets strong enough and attractive enough, it will pull in people or a person who can resonate, read and receive your frequency and most importantly your love and will be the matching other who chooses to have it right that moment.

For me – every time when I surf the love wave I tend to nose dive in the end. Does not matter how much I have surfed in the love ocean before, how many tricks I know or how careful or not careful I am – kind of happens every time. I am learning how to improve, how to read the waves, the love ocean, the wind. Taking the moves accordingly. But I guess it is an everlasting learning lesson. Times like this I feel exhausted.

This Sunday I decided to celebrate my last nosedive – like it is the best thing ever happened to me! I celebrated it with a new haircut, fixed my eyebrows, bought some nice homemade icecream and strawberries and met some friends. I got many compliments about my new hairstyle and that I look so much younger, brighter and happier. Funny, usually after a nosedive, I would have been down for months and really look very bad. Yes, nothing what kills us, makes us stronger. But I just wonder how much stronger do I need to get? I guess only God knows answer to this question.

During the first days in Mexico I have been surrounded by amazing gentlemen friends taking so good care of me, that I am overwhelmed. Does not matter whether it is my groceries I carry (one of them just took it and walked it to the boat) or smth else I need. I just feel so grateful, so deeply grateful. I am learning to receive it as I guess, even though I nose dove, I dove through some new layers and came out that it was actually another heaven…

That is the true lesson of love – when you think you have lost it, you have actually found it. If not outside of you, then for sure inside of you. I am also pretty sure that the Universe has something magical in the works and maybe even wilder than I thought I could create in my wildest dreams? So what is it leave to me? Patience and continuing my love surfing!

Thank you for reading! Enjoy your surfing in the love ocean!

Share your thoughts, ideas and stories about the topic under the story here. I wish you all the best and most amazing self love there is. Always put yourself first!