Insecure Writers Post – Let your creativity penetrate you!

palmtreeblindersI am deep diving into my writing more. I have been preaching to people for more than 15 years – do what you love and the rest will follow. I only now realise that even though I have had exposure for my writing and journalist work both in magazines, newspapers, online as well in radio and TV, I still kind of do not believe it can become your number one triumph or give you all you have dreamt about.  Read my exploration about the topic today!

==dakota johnson

(Photo : Theo Wargo/NBC/Getty Images for ‘The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon’)

I just recently saw some videos with Dakota Johnson, who plays Anna in ’50 Shades of Gray’. The movie sold for like half a billion dollars and was a huge hit worldwide only so because a housewife wrote down her sexual fantasises  and gave people what they needed and suppressed!

When you watch videos with Dakota, you can truly see that she is fully who she is and she believes in her unique artists’ skills and that they can bring her the world and more. She has no fear and she is very courageous. She just does what she loves and candidly so, and all what she needs and more will be delivered.

Why is it then that most of the 7 billion people do not believe that it can be so easy? Why is it we are so rooted in the ‘ you have to work hard to make it’ belief?

More and more I dig and research about my future book about relations in the new time, more and more I find success stories of small things like even e-books sold for couple of bucks. So what is it that is really keeping me back to do it? I have so much material – all I need to do – is to organise it together in such a way it works for my readers and fans.

I am not really such a good system person, even though my last 2 years my own experiments with it have shown that yes – systems can help you to achieve your goals. Like writing a blog for 2 years weekly was a good way to test a system and how it works for me.

But all in all my insight has been – I have to focus on my strengths and writing is one of them. Maybe someone else could help me to systemise it? Why do we think we need to do it all ourselves?

I figured it is partly connected also to the fear of really sharing my uniqueness and talents with the world as then I have to be completely vulnerable to also receive any feedback. It is partly so because I am so used to ‘the hard way’ of making things happen. This is so as I still do not fully believe I am a great writer and a great artist.

One year ago I made a self love declaration with myself. I wrote all the things which I wanted to follow and honour to make me feel happy at any times. It has worked miracles. Even brought me my dream male partner! One of the things I recently added to the list was – dig out all my creative talents as they penetrate me and make me happy and have fun with them.

This last week I discovered that I must be a true artist as something sad happened in my life and I listened to some sad songs and started to write a poem. It came out of me with no effort – weaved together with multitude of meaning in between the lines and it felt like I gave birth to a child.

twoheartsjunglebeachI was thinking about why is it that people most of the time live their life in the past or in the future and not in the now and if we ever are going to be able to live in the now and appreciate all the present moment has to offer?

I understood that I need to honour my artistic commitments and take time to find places, people and space to start to paint again, write books which also get published as well the poems and do my kind of journalism weaved together with my anthropological curiosity about life, people and cultures as well work more with my artistic photography – NOW not later is my very key.

lillseinalBecause for me – being an artist of the word or a colour or a moment – penetrates me from the inside. It awakens my deeper soul to spread the wings and go beyond any limitation I have set to myself or others have set to me. I promised I will take the time to let it penetrate me, get so alive and excited and pull people and places into my life which nourish that need, which make me the unique me who I am to this world.


A little proof to how this work was from my last promotional participation in the local community event Sunset Market here in Mexico where I introduced my Wantra water module work. This is a market, where most businesses in the area can come and introduce what they do. As most people were offering food and drink samples I thought what can I offer? So I sat down and wrote down 78 questions. Soul penetrating questions and put numbers in front of these. I cut them into little ribbons and put them into the bottle. When people passed my table I shouted out: ‘Message from the bottle – no calories – no food poisoning possible! Come and get food for your soul!’

People got curious and came to take the message. Once they read it – they smiled and felt amazed by the accurate message it had for them. They could take the message with them and meditate on it more. By the end of the day almost 70 messages got out there.

One piece of consciousness walking around in the community, all because I had one creative idea. The idea developed further and you may hear more what I did with it later this year.

So do not underestimate your creativity. What makes you feel creative and what conditions or circumstances penetrate you? Let yourself be penetrated by your creativity! It will give you pleasure and may bring the world to your feet! 

Please share with me about your journey into the depth of your creativity! What penetrates your creativity? People, places or emotions or something or someone else?

writerbadgeThis post is done for the Insecure Writers Group. Read more about it here: 

4 thoughts on “Insecure Writers Post – Let your creativity penetrate you!

  1. Music. Music hits me in the gut and gets my creativity going. For a long time I wrote both music and stories (along with poetry for lyrics), but I find the heart tends to gravitate to one side or the other. Writing won–as is proof by my 2 novels and 8 anthologies. I’ll get back to music and one day my musical will see the light of day, but this writerly journey has to play out first.

    • Thank you Crystal for your share. I hope that you get to the music again. I love when different art forms marry each other. Music, light, colours, words, pictures… Endless possibilities. And then put it together in such a way that it will touch people’s hearts and change the world is sublime! Good luck and thanks for the support!

  2. I feel blessed because I’m able to write stories that reach readers. The process of having these characters appear inside my head and allow me to write their stories down feels me with a great sense of peace and fulfillment. When I was young there was nothing I seemed to excel at. My mother was an awesome cook, clothes designer, artist. My sister could host large parties with ease. My brother was a gifted artist. My dad was a great host and singer and dancer. I couldn’t seem to excel in any of those things. Then one day I picked up a pen and started writing stories. I believe, as you do, Crystal, we are all gifted with something unique and special. We are all special and desire to be happy. And our first motto should always be: Be Kind to Yourself.

    Great post, thank you.

    • Thank you dear Joylene for the comment. It is so true, that we all have a special gift to share with the world. At times when the selfpity wave comes over me I start to look for everything I am not. And then again I find that one list of all the talents one of my clients wrote down what she thinks I am starting with the producer of great events, event coordinator, organizer, Social media manager, blogger, writer, author, filmmaker, artist, painter, healer, space holder and so many others and I think what right do I have to say – I am nothing if someone else outside of me sees the gifts and talents. Isn’t that the time to count your gifts and then focus on the ones which make you most happy and see how the rest of it realigns and turns out?

      I got stung by a jellyfish like a month ago. I understood there was a deeper meaning to it and yesterday I did more research on it. It said I should balance my life more, that maybe some areas are taking too much time and then the other ones are left out. Damn right. I am doing the recalculation now as is the universe, taking off some stuff from my plate, so I could focus more on my main gifts and talents which really penetrate me from inside out and form it into some kind of format, so that it can get out there to more people to stop, to think, to reevaluate their life, their goals and dreams. The other message the jellyfish had was that you should just surrender more, not to be too rigid and flow with the currents. I notice now when my mind gets on a way and I am learning how to let my heart guide to take over softly and gently, so that my mind still would feel useful. I need both to dance with all the talents.

      Thank you for never ending support as a fellow writer dear Joylene. You remind me my literature teacher, who was really getting my writing and could give me very essential feedback, which kept me on track. She was my very favourite teacher and sad enough her ways of teaching were so out of the box that the school fired her some years later. But then again, she found other ways to pursue her talents. It is all the divine plan. Isn’t it? Enjoy the beautiful rest of the time in the paradise!

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