When your Inner Woman keeps you up at night…

Aloha everyone here on my English blog! I am so sorry I have not managed to keep it up regularly, but there is a change in the horizon. It has been a crazy year so far – from one move in Hawaii and then our trip to California and Palms Springs and then to Estonia for almost 3 months, 2 weeks in England and back to California and then our move to San Diego in October. Now as we have settled here in San Diego, the schedule with all the activities will get more and more settled so I can get into a routine and will let you know what it will look like in a bit. Thank you for your patience.

Today I will talk about how to reverse your bad emotions or mindset to the better. I will also give you an overview what I have discovered can influence our sleep and what you could do to better your sleep. I will also share how I communicate with my Inner Woman and how important she is in my life. 

Many of you do not know but I have a confession to make. There has been times where I have not been able to fall asleep or sleep at all at nighttime during the last year I would say so. I think doctors would call it insomnia or sleep disruption. I have tried to figure it out from all possible angles. Watch my diet before going to sleep and also during the day. I have gone through couple of major diet changes during the last year. In addition I have started to turn my computer down around 7 pm the latest, and read before going to bed instead. I take care that I have some kind of movement every day. Right now I train 4 times per week in the gym – 2 times I work on general strength and muscle building and I do 2 times of cardio, which I unite with my learning and watch TED talks during that time. The rest of the days of the week I will walk on the beach in the morning or in the evening at least 20 minutes – barefoot in the sand and in the waves. Being in nature calms me down and is so good for our mental health. I also believe it will cleanse our auric field with all the salt ions in the air.

I work much more focused now – I take breaks after every 50 minutes spent in front of  the computer – stand up, stretch and drink something. I have regular healthy snacks according to my diet in every 2 hours after my main meals and I drink water as much as I can, often times also adding electrolytes to my drinks. In the mornings I will also write my morning pages for 20 minutes, which has given me more peace of mind and contentment during the day. I eat very little artificial sugar. I have my cheat days but even then I limit what I cheat with. Instead of a cake it can often times be popcorn instead.

I have also changed my ‘mind food systems.’ Meaning – while driving with the car I do not listen to some random radio show or love songs whining about someone leaving someone, but I listen to audio books with intention and mission, about success habits and such. I have my tasks lists set and ready and I keep myself updated and most of my bad habits are pretty much gone. I must say – life feels a bit boring on that level, but at the same time I have so much more time because I am living more intentionally – I watch where and how I spend my time and what I do with it, so that it would contribute to my and Michael’s better future.

I have at times a bit ‘cave times’ where I am so focused on some research, book or other projects where my social life may be almost non existent, but then again once I get these projects done I allow myself to have fun that way.

On top of it all we also keep up our regular dates with Michael and take time off as often as we can. As two entrepreneurs living together and doing business together – work seems to never end. So you just have to unplug. This last Friday Michael took me flying with a small plane. He is starting to take pilot lessons.

When in moments of despair we need to start to count all what we have accomplished recently, even if these seem small steps and trivial!

During the last 2 months I have worked on launching my very first official Inner Family Therapy Coaching program with my Estonian clients. I have 9 clients on board at the moment and I so enjoy this process. The results are amazing and I am so lucky that I can do what I love like this, living here in San Diego and helping my fellow countrywomen in Estonia despite the distance and time difference.

Our first month focused on the Inner Child and it was quite an active month for my Inner Child to show me things and spend some more quality time with me. Now we just turned into an Inner Woman month. I am so excited about the launch of the program in English as well. Check it out here: 

One of my new missions is to change this world one Inner Family at the time! Check this video about it here:

When I lie in bed and sleep seems do have forgotten me, I go through all the things I just mentioned above – what did I eat today, did I close my computer on time etc, to kind of check what may have influenced it. After going through all of these things I realized it must be something else. Or someone else. Looking around inside of me I found my Inner Woman very sad and unhappy. I took my time to have a conversation with her. I actually went to another room and started to write my morning pages for the next day so that she could already express herself.  20 minutes later my overview was much better.

I understood what had happened and what she needs. My Inner Woman is very sensitive – she can often times even pick up energies and moods of the people in the surroundings. So this is one of the first things I do with her – checking how that is. It did not seem to be the case. So then I asked what is the matter?

She shared her worry if all the things I am doing are the right things and if I am doing them the right way as the results are still very slow. She was very restless as she has not got some extra attention recently. I tried to talk some sense to her, but she kind of did not listen. I said, well – we will talk in the morning then. It is kind of important to let your Inner Family members at any time show who is the main boss in the house!

I then dove into You Tube optimization class online (bear in mind it is like 11 pm…!!!) just to get my mind away from it.

That is what most of us do – kind of like on autopilot. We hate pain, especially emotional pain or restlessness and we try to avoid it or suppress it.

I did not hide it, but I just put it on the shelf to turn back to it, as I under-stood it would not have worked at that moment. This is a very healthy step to take if nothing else is possible at that moment.

In the morning I woke up because of my alarm as I optimistically thought to go and train at 7 am in the morning. I turned the alarm off and slept more as I got to bed at 2 am. I slept one more hour and took off for training. I was amazed that all the traffic lights (which I have maybe around 10 on my path) before getting to my gym were all green! It hardly ever happens and usually if so only when I feel like I am on the top of the world.

My Inner Woman noticed this as well. I always put also intentions going in to the gym that all of the machines I need will be free and available when I get to them. So it was. Works all the time!

After the training almost all the traffic lights were red. I had this crazy depression like sadness coming over me. It was like a heavy black bubble surrounding me. Then I asked my Inner Woman what would help her. She said, lets ask Michael to help. Michael was ready to ask me some more questions.

The main focus was to put focus on what is good, what is well, what is working and what has already given results.

In situations like these we may often turn our head into the corner and miss all the good stuff surrounding us in the room. So I realized yes, he is right – I have got going this Estonian Inner Family coaching program and make a difference in 9 people’s lives and they support and contribute to our lives. They truly enjoy it all! I have sold couple of more spots for our Hawaii retreat next year. We have launched one more program in Estonian which also made some more sales. We fine tuned two other programs online. I have done more videos on our channels. I have kept up with my training very well, as well with my food.

I have fine tuned my habits and quit some bad ones. I have been healthy for the past 3 weeks (which was not the case since August!). I live in a beautiful beach community only 5 minutes from the beach. I am married to a handsome, kind and loving as well smart husband Michael who even takes me to fly with a plane!

I have my own office now where I can work and start to do my healing work and on and on…

Then I started to read Brendon Burchard’s ‘Motivation Manifesto’ and how funny is it that the chapter I was reading talked about the depression and bad mood and how to change it around.

His suggestion was to remind ourselves that bad mood and bad emotions have no power over us if we do not choose them. So we have a choice over our emotions.

But how many people practice that consciously? Even myself – who I consider myself pretty conscious most of the time – may forget it!

It may sound trivial that in moments like this we should count our blessings, but it does not work if we do it on autopilot!

I thought then back to these weeks where I was completely sick most days and what a gift it was that I was back in good health, could walk, have energy and stamina to do things and create what I love. It put things instantly into perspective and made me feel so good.

Or think about these people who on this 3rd of November are drowning into snow, have driven their car off the road and hardly survived or people in New York who were in the midst of flooding!!! I am here in San Diego, it is +25C outside, the skies are blue and I can walk barefoot on the sand and let the ocean waves caress my feet…

My Inner Woman was much happier, even though she even cried a bit.

These are the moments we most often hide away. We do not want the public eye to see our weaknesses or admit that we have those moments, but these moments make us human, make us imperfectly perfect in a cute way and this is what we all have signed up for – the human experience as a spirit.  Now it is up to us whether we truly become human beamings after this experience or struggle with our own limitations and beliefs being still cornered in…

That is where a good and conscious husband comes in handy. Or if you do not have a husband or a wife to lean on, talk to a friend or a family member!

During this summer I had another of those low moments and contacted my sister while in Estonia. It was a luxury moment for me to call her in a moment like this and I realized that I have never really done it (because we live so far away most of the time and when I am up she sleeps and the contrary). I as an older sister have always tried to be the strongest even during my weakest moments. But it was such a delight to feel her support and being there for me and helping me to see the story from a different angle.

This is also a turning point where I am consciously going to starve out my inner villain and step into my hero story as Dean Graziosi recommends in his book Millionaire Success Habits. To help me really change my habits to the core I also joined Dean’s 30 day’s challenge and this has been a huge help with the mindset reset. You can also join for free and build yourself up to a possibility to win some major prizes as well a car. 😉 Check it out here: 

Dreams, Goals and Adventure in Mexico.

All in all no matter where we are in life, it is very important never to lose sight of our dreams. Because our dreams especially when they are connected to our goals will take us to adventures which help us to grow and expand to even better versions of ourselves!

I am so glad I am doing that constantly and doing that with my dear husband Michael. In connection to that I share kindly his current offer for his free book (only pay for shipping) Dreams, Goals and Adventure where he shares his life stories connected to his dreams, goals and adventure.

It is not only an easy read, it is actually a very good read with the twist as in the end of each chapter it gives you a possibility to reflect on your own life – how is it with your dreams, goals and adventure???

It is a superb Christmas gift – especially for younger generation to inspire them to get it going and keep going, but also to anyone who has decided to keep their dreams as their heartbeats to their fulfilling lives. Check the offer out here: 


I am Crystal Ra Laksmi-Ditton. Originally from Estonia, but have lived abroad most of my adult life. I feel my mission is to be the bridge builder between cultures, people and continents.

To remind us all that  we all desire more love, more abundance in order to live our ultimate dreams.

I am here to guide you to open this hidden treasure box where we have our talents, which can activate our holistic abundance and turn our Inner Fairytales to our realities on our terms taking us to our dream destinations!

Together with my husband we are Transformation Navigators, helping people to navigate through the challenging changing times towards their dreams and goals while enjoying life like the most wildest adventure!

Please share with us what have your tools been to fall asleep or get out of the deep sadness or restlessness! Share in the comments!

Check out our Social Media outlets here: 

FB Crystal Ra Laksmi #liquidheavenfacilitator

Crystal Ra and Michael #infiniteactivation

You Tube: #turbonewflow



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