This post is re-edited from the Valentine’s topic. I figured that this topic is relevant 24/7 and 12 months a year. Put all the inspiration into practice and see how it can help you change the quality of your life as well!
I have traveled to 26+ countries and worked with people individually and in groups for 15 years all over the world by now. Every time someone comes to me and says: ‘hey Crystal, my problem is that my money is stuck, or my health is really bad or I do not have enough sex or I hate my job’ – I have noticed and discovered that all the roots of the problem lead us back to the relationship corner in my 6 months self development program (in the process to be translated into English), which I call the ‘abundance wheel’.
Everything in your life what is not working, starts with yourself. It is true, that when you change you, your reality and everything and everyone in it will change. The creation starts with thoughts, then words, then actions and you manifest them into results accordingly. So the first step to take is to start to map your thoughts, your words, your actions. If you find out that most of it is not conscious or balanced, no wonder your life is not working.
Last year was one of the hardest years in my life even though I lived in the paradise. I had so much drama and many dramatic relationships. I experienced abuse in many forms. Till one day when my life was put in danger it woke me up like from some kind of a bad dream. I realized that the very reason why things were manifesting bad, was the fact that I was not thinking kindly and lovingly about myself, I talked badly about myself, I did not take action to take care of myself with love and care, but hate and misery. The result? More misery, hate, drama.
Spirit must love me or I really may have an important part to play on this planet, as I was literally kicked back to stay with my friends for some months, to lick my wounds and re-evaluate. I started to go to Alanon group meetings (even though the groups are located pretty far and it takes me sometimes 5 hours to attend one) as I figured that as the child of an alcoholic many of their patterns where still running me even though both of them are dead by now and killed by the alcohol. I chose not to follow their path and that is one of the reasons why I have quit drinking any alcoholic beverages at all for the last 12 years. But the Alanon meetings have helped me hugely. It is amazing to listen to people’s stories and to know that people have had it worse than me. It is amazing to share my story and know that it may inspire someone to step out from their self created trap as well.
I felt that in order for me to change my life I had to make some new choices and commitments. I chose:
1. I will take full responsibility to create my own happiness.
2. I think, talk and act about myself with loving care, love and kindness no matter what.
3. I set boundaries and say yes and no according to my needs and present moment.
4. I go to Alanon meetings at least once a week.
5. Once a week I have my date time with myself going kayaking and swimming.
6. I do my best to communicate my needs verbally in a friendly and clear way.
7. I do some kind of tantric rituals as often as I can to activate my sexual energy alone or with my partner
8. Possibly go and surf at least once a week.
9. I go to sleep earlier so that I can wake up earlier.
10. I eat healthy
11. I have at least one day off from all kinds of work at least once a week
12. Do something what makes me happy every day
13. Take care of my needs and take responsibility for them
14. I take time to listen to my inner guidance even if it is only 5 minutes a day!!!
All these commitments have given me back my peace, my serenity and happiness.
What commitments could you do with yourself, what would help you to rebuild your life and the new foundation so that would work for you?
As my new foundation for my new happiness was settling down as I completely changed my self care tactics, a new home appeared to me very close to what I ordered, a new job opportunity came where I can use many of my talents and skills I have not used for a long time and even a new partner appeared as I had ordered 2 years ago from the Santa Clause.
Step by step my life keeps unfolding in ways I would not even imagine. The main reason? Because I put myself first, I changed completely my own relationship to myself and from that everything else in my life changed – my health got back in balance, I am happy and balanced all the time, I do what I love, I am taking care of my sexual and sensual needs in ways I have not for the last 2 years, I have kind and happy people surrounding me at all times. I also start to receive more abundance in all forms and invitations to new projects and business opportunities. I live from courage instead of fear. I follow my heart and my intuition. I adventure and have more fun in life. I do more to follow my mission on this planet.
For those of you who have no partner yet, I would recommend to really map your life and your own relationship to yourself (start with the relationship to yourself, then your health, your sexuality, your career, your money and abundance – ask yourself what is not working and what would you like to change? What would your dream life be like?).
Secondly if you do not get any invitations out, enjoy yourself, lay the table for two and imagine having the beautiful dinner with your imagined new partner. Tell him or her all your dreams, ideas, emotions. If possible, even make room in your closet for his clothes or on your shelves in the bathroom. If possible, even buy some small things to really invite him or her into your life. This is to show the spirit that you not only talk about it, but you also take some serious action.
Maybe you can become your own partner and lover this time? What would you like to receive and be you have never got before? Is there an interesting event in your area where you could go and meet new people during that special day? What would it take for you to become your best friend, lover and companion?
Even if you do not have anyone as a partner in your life yet, do not worry. This does not mean that you are a failure in relationships, like I felt for so many years. The first step is to build a new well functioning relation to yourself. Once this is done, all the rest of the structures can be built on it and that makes you much more attractive to your future partner as well.
One is for sure – once you become your best lover, friend and companion, your frequency will change and it will attract your new friends, family, opportunities and your new Valentine into your universe in the most magical way, so that the spirit makes sure, that you will not plan it and just receive it. Like the Christmas present under the tree…
Happy Valentine’s Day! Make it your special day!
About the author:
My name is Crystal Ra Laksmi and I am originally from Estonia. I have been a true vagabond learning by mistake and failure how to live and make business and life work location free for the last 3 years. I have spent my last 1,5 years in West Mexico and love living in the tropics where I enjoy the warm Pacific Ocean almost daily.
I have learned how to live simply and easily and how to value simple things in life, whether it is a hot shower, a roof over my head or money in my pocket. I have also learned that I can live without all the comforts in the world and still be happy. My main mission on this planet is to inspire people to live their dream and live their life inspired by courage and heart and create their own real fairytale – heaven on Earth.
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If you have relationship problems and issues you must know that I also offer coaching for couples and singles via skype. If you would love to experience a romantic honeymoon adventure in Mexico or Hawaii (Big Island) I can organize a custom made adventure especially for you and your loved one as an unforgettable memory for the years to come. Take contact with me here: