I had a very interesting experience this week. One emotional bomb exploded. I felt it coming long before, I had got warnings from my intuition, but still I did not listen. I should go to an intuition training school, where I finally will learn how to listen my inner messages and take these seriously and act accordingly.
During these days it is wise for everyone to check your communication skills and how you do it. Especially if you deal with deals and agreements. People have different understanding about things, as well viewpoints and expectations and opinions. If possible, make a written agreement, so that you have no possibility to misunderstand each other. If something will not be clear enough, please specify it, till you feel absolutely confident, that both sides got the point clearly enough. If possible do not leave any grey zones out there, what may be confusing or in the level of ‘assuming’. If we do not do this, we may create a snowball which starts to roll and suffocate everything on its way and in the end even explode.
If we expect something from the others, we actually put them into a prison. We want them act in a certain way and do things in a certain way, so we could get our needs met or simply, as we would like to manipulate people and situations, they have to be in a way like we choose. If they are not that, we get angry and mad.
It was interesting to experience my water experience with the young people, when we were in a circle and our hands were pointed towards each other. When we were very close to each other, it was very hard to move. More space we had, more flowing it all became and easier it was.
This is a very good example about this if we let everyone be as they are and do not expect them anything, we get all we want and actually more and better than before. In order to get to this point, we have to learn to trust the universe totally and start to cooperate with it and flow with it.
Giving with strings
If someone is asking something from you and you give, then ask yourself and observe whether you give with expectations? Do you just give from your heart or you wait for that someone would do something in a certain way and if they do not, you are going to be very disappointed?
This means that you give without expecting anything else back. Whatever you give, it will be gathered in the universal bank account and according to your needs will be shared and given back to you. This does not come from the same people you did a good deed maybe, but it will come back for sure and you do not need to worry about it. When we give with strings, we actually try to manipulate with that person. We want to make this person do something what we want to get.
People who have many wounds and especially from the childhood, they create small dramas. They represent themselves as the victim and they accuse others in their situation. It is one way how to get energy, but not only, also other things from others – like money sometimes. Their energy source is not connected to the direct universal energy source, they get stuck. Without consciousness they start to take and suck energy from the others through dramas.
The pattern there is following – they will do something, which makes them accusing the other side and make the other side feel bad again, after that the person who is accused may feel bad and lose his or her temper, and that is where the victim gets the energy hooks into the system and start to suck the energy. It is their way to survive.
If the attacked would just let this all go over his or her head like a wave- and would just say – yes really interesting point of view and would not make it overly important, everything would be fine.
But most people are so stuck with their identity and the importance of it, that if someone says something negative about it, they start to fight for it. This kind of people need a lot of confirmation and the outer validation. If they do not get enough of it, they are starting to think of possibilities how to create this and get it by force.
This will create a pattern, where people would not like to be with this person any more, as this is not natural. Isn’t it different when you say a compliment as you see something beautiful, instead that someone is forcing you to say it? Which one of those seems to be easier and more powerful?
This kind of person should really work a lot with their own selfconfidence and value. When that is in order, the outer validation has no role to play any more. These kind of people have also the problem, that as small kids they did not get unconditional love from their parents, they had to earn it.
This creates the problem. This person will start to serve others and almost fight for their wellbeing, but will forget herself or himself, without even knowing when to say no and where it is needed. Later this person will be mad, but not to his or hers own inability to express the needs, where the dog is actually buried, but she or he will be mad towards the others, as they are the cause for what happened in their mind.
This loop goes on and on until they bump into a person like me or someone who is making them to reflect it back to them. Until the pattern is not discovered you can not change it. Most people have resistance to it, as this is the only way they have lived. Older they are, more resistance there is, as they are old and know everything, right?
Try to go through all the points throughout today’s blog and map what situation you have with it.
How precise are you in your communication?
How aware are you of the victim role if you have it?
How much do you give with strings?
How much validation are you looking for on constant bases from outside of yourself?
This overview will help you to become more conscious where and how to change your weak points and what to heal so you can prevent the emotional explosions in the future. I say it again – the trick here is – clear communication + express your needs very clearly. The rest is easy!
I am Crystal Ra Laksmi. I am like a human nature researcher, who is doing lab tests on herself to figure out what works and what does not and finds out why. My blog is a little possibility to be part of this adventure and hopefully get guidance and inspiration to rise the quality of your life. Please share your experiences with this matter under this blog post.
If you just found this post and really like what you read and would like to even meet me in person, you have a chance for that!
I am going to travel to LA area in California and stay there from the 8th of June till the 23rd. I can offer private sessions as well going to have an Access Bars class on the 20th in Oxnard area. Check it out here:
I am going to also be in NYC from the 24th of June till the 2nd of July. There is a Access Bars class there on the 28th in Brooklyn. Check it out here:
I will also do a new time relationship class in NYC with Dina Vitantonio from the 26 – 27th of June. Info about that is coming up next week. Stay tuned!
I am going to be in Estonia, Europe, the rest of the summer. I have many events coming there as well. The biggest interest for you could be my summer retreat in the end of July for 2,5 days. Please check it out here: If you feel like having me as you personal tour guide in Estonia, I am available for that after your retreat.