How far do we get if we try to be like others?

crystaltravelslighth2RREntrance from the end of April, 2013, Cancun, Mexico

I am now packing my stuff to leave Mexico and the last day was too busy even for a blog, but will do some extras to make it up!

Yesterday I got a thought of how much of my life I have wasted because I wanted to be like others or to fit in or to do like others were doing in order for me to be recognized and accepted. How far did it get me? Not very far, I got stuck every single time.

After the Chicago event I have been stepping into my own power more and more with every single breath I take. Sometimes it comes up quite abruptly like a little child, who tries to crawl and then to stand up and falls and hits herself. But I am much better already.

I thought back of so many relationships where  I have lost myself exactly because I wanted to be liked or appreciated or accepted! And when  I lost myself, I felt contracted, small and several times almost got killed. All that urge was rooted in the uncertainty of myself being me.

What if noone will be with me if I am truly me?

That was my everyday question.

In Chicago I chose a personal commitment to totally stand in my power and step into it beyond my wildest dreams. Every day it has brought me more challenges, but I am learning more and more how to balance my life on all fronts. It has not been easy, but I am better with every step and enjoying my empowerment more and more!

One of the core keys I have discovered within the last days is to be me and let others be who they are.

Simple as that. But what happens most of the time is that we would like that others would think or act the same way as we do or that we change ourselves so that they would like us more. I have discovered that when people do not like me it is their choice and I do not fight with it any more. I let them be and go, and focus on people who empower me because with them I can be fully me and be accepted exactly as I am. It empowers me and makes me grow and expand without any limits!

What about you? How much energy and attention do you put into wanting the others to like you? In the core bottom it is all connected to the fear of judgment. If you take that away, let your barriers down, what would happen next? I do not know, try it out and let me know!


Talking to the stranger

I sat down at the airport and there I saw a young man holding a hand on a woman and telling her things. The connection, energy was very sweet, powerful and close. When he left I asked her if that was her son, and she said no, it was her son’s friend who was so kind and drove her all the way to the airport (3 hrs drive one way). It was like 02.30 am. I asked more about her and she shared that she is just about to divorce and going to see her family in New Mexico and stay there to calm down for some weeks. Then she asked me where I am at and up to. I told her that I have been in a very challenging place and now taking my steps to get back into my own power and had an amazing weekend in Chicago with loads of people and world leader’s. She listened carefully.

Talking to each other, our eyes got wet, there was a connection, energy. Total strangers, who had just talked out of the blue like 10 minutes. We talked about our dreams, our challenges and our dreams and needs. How amazing is that?

I personally feel that the energy and connection I have to myself is totally different after this weekend. Something totally shifted in me and the depth and presence which has come from it is mindblowing. I feel that I am finally deepdiving on land. I will give this woman my card, and if she chooses to, maybe I am so lucky to see her at some later point in my life and share more who knows?

Never underestimate a talk to the stranger! As you never know what may come out of it. Maybe even a new friendship or new miracles! I do not even know the name of the woman, but she touched me with her being and presence. I am so grateful for her openness sharing something so vulnerable as the divorce can be. I feel gifted, by the touch of her being tonight. The presence. I believe in her. I told her so. I told her that she is an amazing person. Her eyes got wet again. Sometimes a kind word or two  is all what can make your day or night. She made mine. Thank you stranger!

How to follow the signs?

I had an interesting incident in Chicago Midway airport. I had to go to the toilet and tried to find it real quick, I looked at the signs on the walls and could not see one of them, so went downstairs, which took me much more time. The sign I needed was more up, so if  I had looked more up I could have saved some time.  Sometimes in life you need just this little to find your way.

Then I thought how amazing is this, as this is often happening with many people in life as well, that we look for signs and then miss one of it because of the stress or not being fully present? What would it take for us to always follow our signs directly, so we get where we would like to get with full support and ease right away?

Gratitude from the heart

How amazing is this? I spent an amazing evening with my two very amazing Estonian goddesses in Chicago, Sirje Press andHelbe  Lume and got to go to the  Estonian sauna with them and enjoyed the best amazing meal ever! And on top of it got driven all the way to the airport in the middle of the night, while Sirje stole almost 3 hours of her sleep time for me. Gifts like that are amazing and never to be forgotten! Thank you, your contribution is so valued!

Throughout the whole trip, I experienced miracle after miracle and it has been so amazing to be grateful for every single one of them! How blessed can we be and how much more can we create and attract, if we also count all our small blessings – I wonder! I am so grateful for all the women who donated money for my trip in Chicago, my amazing hostesses in Chicago: Sirje Press and Greta Campagnolo and Lisa Burnham and all the fun time we all had together! I am stepping myself into a new sisterhood and womanhood time and it is so amazing! Thank you, thank you! How lucky am I?

naisedchicagosI feel how every step with gratitude opens up more and more doors for me as well as more opportunities create itself with ease and abundance and I feel again that my world cares about me as I care about me and I have got back my vision and targets where to move to. I am so excited, so full of life and totally empowered! This event and the whole adventure which took almost a week of my life, gave me my life and my fullfillment back to me! Gratitude arises from the bottom of my heart to the world and every quantum particle being part of creating this! Thank you!

Are we all travelling places to meet ourselves?

I worked throughout almost the whole night online, and got to bed quite late. I decided before going to bed, that I am going to have an adventure and leaving early next morning.

Morning came and I felt the laziness in me wanted to take over, saying: letssleep some more! Maybe TOMORROW we go for a trip???!! Does that sound familiar? I knew that today was the day, so I got myself out of bed and got ready. I travelled to Tulum, where there is a national park, Mayan ruins and amazing beaches and even more so amazing people.

I presumed, that there would be a straight street going to the beach from the central part of Tulum. Just trusting that I got off there. I got the map and started to walk in the direction towards the ocean, not really thinking. Sometimes it is really good if you are not thinking.

What happened was that after 10 minutes or so I realized it was a bit wrong direction. I tried to ask locals, but noone spoke English. So they just pointed in one direction. But I knew I had to check. Then I saw a woman coming towards me.

tulumgirlfriendShe looked very tanned, so I did not quite know how to talk to her, but I started in English. She is Julie Ann from Michigan and was just wandering around. She said she knows there is a local bus station somewhere and that she is going to help me to find it. So she just turned around and came along with me (this is btw pretty usual here).

In this adventure she finally found post office, as well another shop, which she lost out of sight and the problem here is that the whole place is so new, that they do not even have street names! In London I was pissed off as the street signs were really not on the corners of the street, but here no street signs at all!

Check out this video of her here

How amazing! We did not manage to find the bus station first, so she asked some locals, it was so real and so fun! Julie Ann is such a bubbly and happy person and how lucky am I to have run into her? She has been teaching Mayans for many years ago and also just recently, but now is looking for new possibilities. Finally we found the bus station. Next bus was about to come, but justin  1,5 hours later. But as it is in Mexico, if you start to move to one place, you may go to some other places in between as it is no hurry to get to your final destination. We then went to get some cold drinks and talking was so flowing and easy and natural. Like old friends.

We talked some more and then got the information that the bus what I waited for does not go to where I needed. So we went back to the main street and looked for the small minibuses. So she spent all this time to get me safely to the bus. How amazing! Thank you! Sometimes it literally feels we have human angels walking on Earth!

vorkkiiged tulumI asked her if she is on Facebook or if she has a website. She has not, but we talked some more. On our last 10 minutes she started to talk about her talents, about her ideas and the whole lot what she has already done! I got a blinking light in me. To help her to make her own website and also introduce her into Empower Network, God she would rock in the women’s group like crazy! I told her all that, we exchanged cards and she was agree that something needs to be done. So we are going to meet tomorrow and she is going to show me one other amazing magical place and even make us some lunch. That is what I call a real cariloha! Wow!

My day around the ruins was amazing, the views, the colors, the ocean and the day was just superb. I felt myself totally in my element, all the negativity, doubt got cleared out. For me it works really easy, during the day I adventure, which very often is also the field work as in anthropology for me, as I get loads of ideas during my adventures, plus loads of connections and during the night I work online. Two Swedish people passed me and I stopped them, started to talk in Norwegian and it was a nice group! Next time, I have my card in handy!

 tulumchairsI also thought that it was amazing that I adventured alone, as when you are alone, you are wide opened. I basically followed my heart and got to see Tulum from a totally different point of view and got possibly a new friend as well.

The Mayan ruins, will need some extra time in the blog, will write more about it in some of the coming days. I also love the video shooting, it is just so much fun. My creativity just kicks my ass!

So to finalize!

  1. What if every morning there would be no Tomorrow to postpone things to and you would CHOOSE IT NOW instead?
  2. What if you would do a little discovery of the unknown every single day?
  3. What if you would talk to strangers every day? (I am excited about this to try out more in Estonia, wohoo! (they usually freak out))
  4. Would talking to strangers contribute to you and your business(es)?
  5. What would happen if you would follow your inner guidance istead of going from A til B?
  6. What if each one of us is a contribution to the other in ways we can not even imagine?
  7. What if life can be an adventure and fun all the time?

mexicanbusI hope you have fun, wherever in the world you are, and let me know if you feel inspired by my blogs and videos and if you have some questions how to have an adventurous life location free as well!

Cariloha from Mexico, Tulum, end of April 2013.

Do not ask for a miracle, become one yourself!

I decided yesterday that I am traveling to Chicago for the Empower Network event this weekend, as I am stepping UP and back into my power! Wohoo! I still do not have the whole amount of money, but I have made my choice and taken some action steps (like finding a place to stay and some part of the tickets),  so the rest can come and create the miracle from my inner core!

I am doing two things here. Firstly I jump and take the leap, trusting my heart’s call and secondly I risk, by kissing the unknown, not knowing exactly how to get all the pieces together yet. I stay in the question, and I am ready to recieve and allow the Universe in all its aspects to contribute to me, because I know I am totally finished with trying to make it all by my own. I am ready for the SHIFT TO HAPPEN! The contribution to flow in from people, possibilities, work, ideas etc.historycrystal

I understood that the miracle is not something outside of me, it can just be me by having a new choice!

I understood today also that in order to create a new future, I should go through and adjust my 4 V’s.

I call them 4 V’s as in my home language these words start with a letter ‘V’.

  1. Viewpoints (Vaatenurgad)
  2. Values (Väärtused)
  3. Needs (Vajadused)
  4. Shadows (Varjud)

I understood that these are the main building blocks which have been holding me back from my own power.

1.Viewpoints – a victim mentality, not good enough, I do not have this or that and because of that I have no CHOICE UNIVERSE etc. As we know what you think, you create! So what if not only me, but everyone would throw these out of the window, what would happen?

2. Values – I figured during these last weeks, that my core values are EMPOWERMENT AND INTEGRITY AND AUTHENTICY. So what would happen if I totally embrace these qualities? Would I attract similar people into my reality? Would they support me on my path?

3. Needs – the ability to talk about my needs and ask for what I need, especially if it is for help, like asking for money has been very challenging for me. What if I also change that? I just say out loud what I need? Being courageous for taking care of my needs and find the ways to do it!

4. Shadows. As this society has brought us up with the knowing that shadows (all the negative and hidden stuff) is bad, we act accordingly. I feel it is the time where the shadows come out and ask for more attention and integration. They are asking for the embracing touch and presence. In the world of polarity I am now learning how to dance with my shadows and not feel bad about it. I am still learning how to do it so that people would feel invited to come to the exploration with me, not to run away.

With the simplicity and complexity I truly am, the dance of polarities and elements, I am now fully stepping into my power to become the MAGIC I TRULY AM, because where there is a will, there is the way.  Would you like to become a miracle yourself, pls ask me how!


Entry from mid April 2013, Mexico, Cancun

[author] [author_image timthumb=’on’][/author_image] [author_info]Crystal Ra Laksmi (36), originally from the birthland of Skype – Estonia – but a global citizen circling around the globe on her orbit to bring forth transformation and share her experience how everything is possible if you find your voice and start to use it and stand in your own power while creating your dream life![/author_info] [/author]